Whether you’re a hairstylist or you’re the type of person who gets their hair done often, sometimes a funny hair quote is just fun to share with friends! We’ve all been there – frizz, fried locks, discoloring, DIY bangs, and more.
So let’s commiserate with some humor! Since many of us have hair troubles and find solace in hearing about other people’s hair issues, get the stress off your chest with some hair jokes.
Think about how you feel when a friend shares a funny quote or joke with you. It takes the stress out of something that might be weighing heavily on your mind! Having an awesome stash of hair quotes on your phone can come in handy.
From hair school to the salon, to road trips, and even sharing on Pinterest – you’ll be the go-to person when your friends need to cheer up or vent about their own hair issues.
Funniest Hair Quotes to Laugh Out Loud
Below are a few of the best funny hair quotes we’ve pulled together. Some are ‘punny,’ some might be relatable for you, and all are share-worthy! Choose one or choose them all to text to a friend or laugh about in the salon!
1. I had to change my hairdresser. It’s a shame, but I know all the good things must eventually comb to an end.
2. My therapist thinks I’m a really shy person. He says I should let my hair loose from time to time.
3. The barber saw my wig and offered me a full discount. I didn’t have toupeé for anything.
4. My girlfriend is not used to wearing fringes, but she’ll get the bang of it.
5. I told my barber that I didn’t like my hair straight, but he did nothing about it. He couldn’t curl less.
6. I told my barber that I didn’t like my hair straight, but I should’ve known he was homophobic.
7. An unaired episode of Breaking Bad featured Walter White with long hair, looking for a new style. There he tells a hairdresser to “thread lightly”.
8. My mother didn’t like my new mohawk, so we got into a very heated argument about it. It was quite a hairy situation.
9. Ponytails are amazing for messy and stressful days. They’re very comb-fortable.
10. My stylist suggested a new haircut, but I’m not really sure about the idea. I said I’ll mullet over.
11. I wasn’t open to trying new hair colors until my stylist convinced me and it was an experience to dye for.
12. Coronavirus is tough for bald people. The balder you are, the harder it is not to touch your face.
13. Once you go bald, you never go back :(.
14. My hair is short ‘cause it’s like my *enis: serious.
15. Hair is like buying greeting cards. Three inches is more than enough.
16. Hairdressers should have to sign NDAs for the personal things we tell them.
17. Once a woman rides a horse for the first time, her hair automatically grows down past her waist.
18. Find someone who loves you like a bald man loves hats.
19. Want to look like a human Lego character? Try Mousse!
20. Mullets have made a comeback so I guess the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse should be here any minute now.
21. Men going bald and gray is the universe trying to restore balance to society.
22. Straight white men seem to think their hair is their child because they seem to love intentionally neglecting it.
Short & Funny Hair Quotes
Hair today, gone tomorrow.
Life’s too short for boring hair.
I make hair contact before eye contact.
My hairstyle is called “I tried.”
Sorry, I can’t hear you over my fabulous hair.
I came, I saw, I had a bad hair day.
My hair has a mind of its own.
Great hair, don’t care.
Hair so big, it’s full of secrets.
Frizz happens, embrace the chaos.
I got 99 problems, but a haircut ain’t one.
Having a messy hair day? Blame gravity.
Too much hair, not enough coffee.
If my hair looks good, I can deal with anything.
My hair is a work in progress, just like me.
When your hair’s on point, life’s on point.
I didn’t choose the hair life, the hair life chose me.
My hairstyle is called “whatever, I’m late.”
Long & Funny Hair Quotes
Hair today, gone tomorrow, but the memories of a bad haircut last forever.
If at first you don’t succeed, it’s probably because you’re having a bad hair day.
My life is basically just one big quest for the perfect hair day.
Hair: the only thing that can truly make you feel like a queen or a hot mess, depending on the day.
The early bird catches the worm, but the second mouse gets better hair.
Can’t decide if my hair looks better up, down, or somewhere in between – I guess I’ll just wing it.
I’ve got 99 problems, but a bad hair day is currently number one.
Is it just me, or does my hair have its own social life?
My hair is like a mood ring: you can tell how I’m feeling based on its level of frizz.
When your hair gets caught in your lip gloss, you know it’s time for a change.
Some days, my hair is more tangled than my headphones after being in my pocket.
If my hair could talk, it would definitely have some crazy stories to tell.
On a scale of 1 to 10, my hair’s personality is definitely an 11.
I’m starting to think my hair has a mind of its own – and it’s feeling rebellious.
When you accidentally use hairspray instead of deodorant, you know it’s going to be an interesting day.
Remember, you’re never fully dressed without a messy bun.
If you think your life is complicated, just take a look at my hair routine.
My hair and I have a love-hate relationship – but mostly, we just need therapy.
If my hair could take selfies, it would have a better social media following than me.
In a world full of trends, sometimes it’s best to just let your hair do its thing and hope for the best.